Saying No and People Pleasing

Happy Tuesday everyone! I hope you all are having a great week so far. It’s hotter than heck in Texas. Yesterday, the temp was 102 but it felt like 112 – what the?

After today, I will be 2 weeks into the 75 Hard challenge! I weighed myself today and I’ll be honest – I’m a little disappointed. I have only like 3 lbs. Now…that’s 3 lbs which is great! But not on Keto. And not with working out. So…what gives?

If I really look at my eating the past 2 weeks, I’ve been eating a decent amount of dairy. Dairy is high in fat which equals higher calories. So if I’m eating like “normal” but realistically probably the same amount of calories, then I’m not losing weight. Ok, that makes sense. I think about my meals yesterday – combo fajitas with no tortilla but I ate the beans (you’re not really supposed to eat them because they are starchy) and a keto lasagna with fathead dough noodles (again, high in cheese which is high in fat which is high calorie). Moving forward, I just have to be more conscious on calories. I’m terrible at putting in all the food into MyFitnessPal but now I know I need to be better at it. It just kinda takes the area out of your steam right?

Other than weight loss, I’m really proud of how well I’ve stuck to the daily routine. Now, y’all know I’m not doing 2 workouts a day but I am doing the 1 workout outside. As I mentioned last week, I had trouble the first few days to get motivated but now it’s just a part of my day. I know that I am going to do a 45-60 minute walk or 45 minute run after work. No matter the temperature. I’ve started listening to a podcast during the walk which has helped me continue doing it because that’s the only time I listen to the podcast. I have also been reading the “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do” which has been good. I really liked the chapter on control and saying no. The one on saying no, really had some good insight.

The chapter on learning how to say no and not be a people pleaser really was eye-opening. I don’t allow a lot of opportunities in my life for the option to even say yes (thank goodness) but I am very much a yes-man and people pleaser, for the most part. The biggest “aha” moment was something along the lines of (paraphrasing) “When you say yes to someone it’s usually because you are worried what they will think about you saying no and that you’ll come across selfish. But in reality, that’s selfish. Because you are thinking that you hold so much power and “center dialogue” in someone else’s mind and life that when you say no that’s all they think about. Which is not true.” Want to talk about strong?? Wow. I’m not the only thing people think about. And while I feel guilty saying no and obsess about me saying no, that person has already moved on with their life.

An interesting thing of saying no that I have a problem with, is I usually don’t have a “good enough” excuse. When I was task forcing in Houston and they asked me to come back another week, I said yes without really taking a second to think about it and say no. Did I want to stay? No, not really. But in my mind, do I have a “good enough reason” to say no? No. I’m single. I don’t have kids. I don’t have family that lives with me. Yes, I have my dog but she was at my parents house anyway. So I don’t *really* have to be home or anywhere for anyone. But in the chapter, it also talks about saying no to give you some time to yourself or for your well-being. Just because you don’t have someone to take care of or anything like that, doesn’t mean you say yes. I could have had appointments to go to, plans with friends, and those are just as important.

I’m now in the chapter talking about dwelling on the past. Which I mostly don’t do but do see myself doing from time to time. Interesting stuff.

I have a few recipes coming out this week – hopefully you like them. Follow my Instagram for updates on the 75Hard Challenge @eatrunsouthern .

I hope you all have an awesome week and stay safe!

Published by eat run southern

Love fitness but also love food! Follow me along on my journey.

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